Unsolicited advice is the worst. Unless it’s done anonymously over the internet, with the best of intentions… and then maybe it’s okay. Maybe. First we started with the rookies. Then it was advice for those who have been at this for a bit. Today is for those who consider themselves “experts”.

#1. Resist getting weird.

“Boring” doesn’t mean bad to all. Or any.

So you’ve got it pretty much figured out. Awesome. But there’s a threshold one risks crossing. At some point, normal becomes boring, and the risk is you start reaching for extremes just to keep yourself entertained. At first, some will probably think it’s charming. Cute even. But left unchecked, you quickly spiral into the realm of inappropriate and flat out bizarre. It’s The Depp Effect. And then, it’s tough to be taken seriously. Most of us use style as a tool. Keep in mind what purpose you’re using that tool for.

#2. Pass along knowledge & your opinion… when asked.

 If they didn’t ask, then don’t offer your advice.

A lot of us have probably been asked at one time or another from a friend or acquaintance to provide some sort of advice on style. And that’s a flattering thing to be asked. If they didn’t think you looked good, they wouldn’t ask. And we all remember what it was like starting out. It was hard. Embarrassing even. And many of us didn’t WANT to ask someone where they got their shoes, or why their suit looked so good. But just because you think someone might want to ask a question or two, doesn’t mean you should preemptively answer them. You’re not their personal stylist, and most of the world finds the topic of men’s clothing excruciatingly boring. Wear it. Don’t share it. Unless asked, then yes, absolutely.

#3. Keep it in perspective

Musta been the dysentery.

This is different than #1. This is less about the wardrobe and more on how much time/effort/money you spend on it. If the first thing people will say about you when you die is: “He was so well dressed.” Well then, what the hell?

Unsolicited advice is the worst. Unless it’s done anonymously over the internet, with the best of intentions… and then maybe it’s okay. Maybe. First we started with the rookies. Today is for those who have been at this for a bit. Finally, we’ll wrap up with advice for those who consider themselves “experts”.

#1. Develop a great relationship with a Good Tailor

Somewhere between beginner and intermediate, we all figure out that having our suits, blazers, shirts, etc… tailored is often (always?) a worthy investment. But always using the faceless tailoring department at a big box store or dry cleaners is sorta like having your hair cut at Supercuts. And no, that’s not a criticism of the talents of the person wielding the scissors. The downfall is having a different person doing the work each time, and never developing a relationship… and thus… good communication, with that person. You want someone you can get to face to face (and garment to garment) with. They’ll see you, get to know you, you’ll get to know them, and you become a team. They’ll come to respect you, and how you feel your clothes should fit.

They’re stunningly similar. Consistency + communication = great results.

#2. Get good at taking care of your stuff

Just like when you were a kid, you gotta put your toys away. Even if you’re on a strict budget, your clothes will look better and last longer if you get proficient at maintaining them. That means getting good at laundry (i.e. reading tags, not shrinking stuff, finding  good detergent), ironing, taking care of your shoes, and storing all of it properly. It takes time. Lots of practice. You may sometimes wash a blazer, forgo shoe trees for your best dress shoes, or use crappy hangers for everything. Even sweaters (nooooo!). It’s a process. Respect what you’ve earned to acquire. But don’t forget to get out there and use it. Don’t be Cameron’s Dad from Ferris Bueller.

Oh look. Must be Sunday afternoon.

#3. Limit asking for style critique from strangers on the web

Short version: Trust yourself. Long version: When starting out, the web and its communities can be a big help. But the risk is you end up becoming part of the cycle of cyber-menswear-addicts who spend more time looking at pics of suited-up strangers on the web than going out and living their life. Pictures on the web, usually either photoshopped to death or alternatively with poor lighting, shadows galore, and bad angles, don’t give the correct representation of what something looks like in-person anyway. Put a still image within a frame and every little tiny imperfection is going to stand out. Post something that’s 90% awesome on the web, 95% of the viewers will crush that negative 10%, while 99.999% of people in public would never think anything other than “wow, that dude looks sharp“. This seems hypocritical coming from this source (a website) but when in doubt, log off.

Unsolicited advice is the worst. Unless it’s done anonymously over the internet, w/ the best of intentions… and then maybe it’s okay. Or totally not. Anyway, this one is for the rookies. Up next is advice for those who are well on their way. Then we’ll finish this series with (unsolicited!) advice for the self appointed style experts.

#1. Try a size down

Left: Medium. Fine, but a bit boxy.  Right: Small. Fitted, but not tight.

It doesn’t hurt to just try a size down. There’s something about the “you’ll grow into it” clothing strategy that somehow sticks with men as we go from adolescent to adulthood… and sometimes real far into adulthood. We think that anything relatively fitted won’t be “comfortable.” Horse feathers. Clothing that fits isn’t tight. Nor is it loose. It skims the body. It doesn’t cling to it. So try a size down in shirts, pants (inseam and waist), and especially suit jackets, blazers, and sportcoats. You’ll look stronger and leaner. Here’s a few tricks that can help land the right fit.

#2. Get good at shopping smart, but don’t buy something just because it’s on sale.

Cole Haan’s Lunargrand in “Red Multi Mosaic Camo.”
The fact that they were $248, and are now $129.95, means diddly-poo.

For those of us who aren’t rookies at this dressing-better thing, think of the collective cash we all burned along the way. Only pay full retail if you REALLY want it, and you just can’t wait for a sale. Yet at the same time, don’t buy something you only think you might wear, simply because it’s marked down. This is especially true for items that are close to your size, but not actually your size. If it doesn’t fit, or can’t be tailored to fit, don’t pick it up.

#3. Go Slow

And suddenly, all of Frank’s co-workers at the salvage yard stopped talking to him.

It’s awfully hard to go from cargo shorts + graphic tee guy, to three piece suit guy overnight. It’s a process, and by jumping in head first, you risk looking out of place. There will be disappointments. And there are plenty of reasons as well as opportunities for a guy to dress well. But that doesn’t mean you have to start wearing a tux every night for dinner. Work up to it. Want to start wearing blazers more often? Pick up a cheap, cotton sportcoat, and get it tailored. Wear it out to dinner here and there. You’ll get there.

The Author, Tim S., is a government relations professional in Washington, DC. He has two boys in diapers and a wife who lovingly tolerates his enthusiasm for the Dallas Cowboys and his style excursions. Except when he speculates that his three-year-old might be nearing the age where he can mix in a pocket square.

I discovered Dappered last fall at a perfect time: I had just turned 40 and moved from a job where the dress code was mostly business casual to a job where it is mostly Dress Like You Are Important. It wasn’t that I dressed badly before: even in hindsight I was probably ahead of 70% of the guys in my demographic. One year of Dappered articles later, I’ve turned over 80 percent of my wardrobe, and strangers routinely ask me for fashion advice. I knew I had progressed when I recently boarded a plane and a flight attendant remarked “Wow, you win the award for best-dressed!” To which my bemused wife (loudly) responded “He’s having a mid-life crisis.” Hey, a prophet is without honor in his own country. But I hope my fellow travelers here at Dappered can benefit from some of the lessons I’ve learned.

Lesson #1: The Johnny Cochrane Rule (if it doesn’t fit…)

As I sit in airports and people-watch, I’m struck not so much that American men dress badly, but that they generally wear the wrong size. Perhaps it is an adolescent insecurity hangover: most boys start picking out their own clothes at a time they want to be bigger and stronger, so moving from “Medium” to “Large” represents progress. It’s the opposite with women, most of whom are delighted if a smaller size fits. My biggest Dappered-inspired “ah-ha” moment came when I realized that most of my clothes were a size too large. Now, I always try on the next size down. And no matter what an items’ “hanger appeal,” if the fit isn’t nearly perfect, I put it back. To paraphrase the immortal Johnny Cochrane “If it doesn’t fit, you must (a)quit,”

The Epitomizing Item: Bonobos Straight Leg Grey Travel Jeans ($45 new on eBay). Now I know why so many guys swear by these things. For me, nothing fits better than a pair of Bonobos travel jeans. They somehow manage to be snug without being tight, and rugged without being scratchy. I recommend sizing down one inch from your standard jeans size.

The Lesson #2: The Nick Wooster Rule (Jackets win)

When I started reading Dappered and other menswear sites, I noticed the ubiquity and panache of my fellow native-Kansan, Nick Wooster. I could never pull-off his more daring looks (though my one-year old has some camouflage shorts that lead me to call him “Wooster Baby.”) But I was struck by this interview, where Wooster explained “A Jacket is the foundation of a guy’s wardrobe.” It makes sense: whether as part of a suit or just a blazer, a well-tailored jacket is engineered to flatter male proportions. Every guy should own a versatile blazer or three. And remember to do the Shoulder into Wall Trick.

The Epitomizing Item: J. Crew Ludlow Navy Blazer ($150 new on eBay). Retails for $300, with a well-earned spot at the top of the Blue Blazer Hierarchy. A heavier half-canvassed chest piece in luxurious Vitale Barberis Canonico wool. Cut slim and fits me almost perfectly off-the-rack. Hugely versatile. Probably qualifies as my single favorite clothing item.

The Lesson #3: E-Bay is a Convenient Super Thrift Store

Maybe you’re noticing a trend here: I’ve bought a lot of my best stuff on eBay at steep discounts. For those new to it, eBay isn’t the equivalent of a giant attic clearance. It’s like an aggregator of all of the world’s best thrift stores where you can sort through the merchandise without leaving your laptop.

Three tips:

1. As with all online shopping, know your size in a particular brand before you buy. I know from in-store experience that I wear a medium in JCrew’s Ludlow dress shirts, so this is a great option for me.
2. Look for auctions by non-professional sellers. There is heightened risk with buying from those who are thinly reviewed, but there’s a big upside: infrequent sellers don’t know how to take appealing photographs and write headlines that drive up demand. My tweed Ludlow blazer would have gone for $125+ with an experienced seller, but the seller I purchased it from included neither “J Crew” or “Ludlow” in his headline or ad copy.
3. Use Gixen. Gixen is a service that is like hiring an eBay ninja to attend every auction in your place. You choose your maximum bid and walk away. Gixen automatically “snipes” your bid at the last possible second, and if your max is more than required, eBay defaults to a final price “one unit more than the next-highest bid.” That’s usually about a dollar. And Gixen’s basic service is free.

The Epitomizing Item: Ludlow Yorkshire Tweed Blazer ($50 on eBay). Cut slim in Abraham Moon fabric that is softer than most tweeds and versatile enough to be worn most places from fall-through-spring. I’ve worn it three times this year, and I’ve gotten at least one compliment from a stranger each time.

Lesson #4: Amortize (consider the math)

My wife and I had our second child last year, and we completed our slide into American suburbanism by buying an SUV. We paid cash for a 2009 model, and I remember thinking “This car will last for eight or nine years at our projected usage, so this will cost us x per year, etc.” Until recently, I had never thought of buying clothing that way. But we should do the same-kind of cost benefit analysis with most clothing purchases that we do with other depreciable assets. A $300 pair of Goodyear-welted shoes in a venerable style has a seven-to-ten year life expectancy. In total expenditures, that is far superior to my old practice of buying and discarding (uglier) $100 shoes after 18 months of use.

The Epitomizing Item: Allen Edmonds Clifton Oxford in Brown Burgundy ($250 at Nordstrom end-of-year sale). I wear these three or four days a week. Dark enough to work with virtually any suit or jeans. The uncomfortable two-week break-in period gives way to a fit as comfortable as an old pair of sneakers.

Lesson #5: Square Up (pocket, not shoes)

Following the Wooster Rule requires accessorizing alongside your jackets. And the single item under $20 that will give you the highest style return on investment is the pocket square. Even in Washington, DC, where everyone wears a suit and tie, hardly anyone else adds a pocket square. If you are new to the pocket square game, I recommend that your first three purchases be a high quality white linen, a tipped square in a neutral color, and a versatile plaid.

The Epitomizing Item:  Tie Bar linen square with navy border ($10) A crisply-pressed linen square is appropriate when dressiness is called for, but can be casually folded into a cotton or tweed blazer. As with navy ties, the color coordinates with a high percentage of suit/tie/shirt combinations.

Ask A Woman:  Dressing down when you’re up above 40.

If you’ve got a question that needs the female treatment, chances are you’re not the only one who wants to ask it. Beth is our source for the answers. From opinions on men’s style to decoding the sometimes mysterious ways of women, she’ll take on a different question every Thursday. And don’t worry, your identity will be protected too. Click here to get to know Beth, then get in touch with her by sending your question to: askawoman@dappered.com

Hi Beth,

I’m wondering if I am too old for my casual dress attire.  I’m 41 but tend to look much younger as I keep in shape and have a full head of hair without going grey yet (just my beard, but I’m clean shaven).  I enjoy my youthful appearance, but don’t what to look out of place if I dress too young .

I typically like to wear jeans with a trim un-tucked button down shirt (7 diamonds, Calibrate or Boss) and keep a fairly conservative style (nothing fancy).  I’m in reasonable shape at 5’11” 170lbs, but wondering if I’m just too old to be dressing this way.  I think my shirts look stupid tucked into jeans, and don’t know if I need to chuck the jeans all together and go business casual on the weekends too?

My friends my age are all getting heavier, going bald or graying and tuck cheap off the rack shirts into jeans and I feel like I look out of place sometimes.  Any thoughts?

David

Hi David,

Oooh, 41, eh?  ‘Bout to kick the bucket?  Wondering when you’re gonna croak?  Well you’ve lived a good life, my friend, take comfort in that at least.  (Is the sarcasm getting through, David?)  I think you should go on dressing the way you’ve been dressing, but before we get to that point, let’s talk about why your friends might be dressing differently than you.

Your friends may be tucking their shirts into jeans because they are, as you mentioned, getting heavier, and they don’t want their beer belly swaying in the wind underneath the shirt.  But this would be the case whether they were 31 or 41–it’s a matter of weight gain, not age (although the two, unfortunately, do go hand in hand).  As for their choice in clothing–“cheap off the rack shirts”–this may also be because they’ve gained weight.  Taking care in your appearance is a sign of self-respect and confidence, and often (though not always) with weight gain, those two things diminish a bit.  Their motivation to seek out high quality clothing may not be there.

It may not be an issue of weight gain at all, but simply a lack of interest.  They just don’t care that much about clothing anymore.  They’ve seen enough fads; they’ve been in enough fitting rooms.  Maybe it seems vapid and unimportant next to their careers and families and hobbies; maybe they simply have no time to worry about whether their outfit is on-trend.  Whether it’s weight gain or lack of interest, my point is that none of your friends are saying to themselves when they get dressed in the morning, “Man, I’d rather wear a pair of tailored wool trousers and a fine merino sweater and a pair of wingtips, but since I’m halfway to 80 you know what that means–stonewashed jeans and that booster club t-shirt from my son’s school.”  They aren’t wearing what they’re wearing simply because they’re getting older; they’re wearing what they’re wearing because their bodies have changed or they don’t value style anymore, both of which can be attributed to aging, but are not the same thing as age.  You follow me?

You’re not in the same boat as your friends.  You still want to look sharp.  I say bravo! You’re not too old to wear jeans (but not these, please).  You’re not too old to wear untucked button down shirts.  Don’t force yourself into tucked-in flannels just because your friends are.

As far as feeling out of place…this issue seems no different than the readers who have chimed in over the past year and a half about being called out by friends and coworkers for being “so dressed up.”  If you put a lot of care into your appearance, you will inevitably feel out of place at times because–to make a generalization, but one that I feel is true–most people don’t give a damn what they put on their bodies.  Next time you’re at the grocery store, look around.  You’ve got the teenager in her pajama pants and slippers over near the deli; you’ve got the 30-year-old dude in a t-shirt with holes at the armpits; you’ve got the 45-year-old woman wearing no bra and a sweatshirt that goes down to her knees.  Next to this crowd, anyone with access to a mirror would be out of place.  Accept that you like what you like, and wear it well.

Finally, if all this doesn’t convince you–my grandma is 92.  She wears jeans.  Yes, she has them laundered at the dry cleaners and they are pressed right down the middle of the leg, but she’s got ’em.  If Granny can, you can.

-Beth

Got a question for Beth? Send them to: askawoman@dappered.com

Ask A Woman:  Should you really wait three days to call after you meet her?

If you’ve got a question that needs the female treatment, chances are you’re not the only one who wants to ask it. Beth is our source for the answers. From opinions on men’s style to decoding the sometimes mysterious ways of women, she’ll take on a different question every Thursday. And don’t worry, your identity will be protected too. Click here to get to know Beth, then get in touch with her by sending your question to: askawoman@dappered.com

Hello Beth

I met a lady at a bar one evening.  We hit it off right away and even exchanged a few kisses.  I asked for her email and she jokingly said “Here, you can even Facebook stalk me.”  I email her the following morning saying how it was a pleasure meeting her and that I’d like to “keep in touch”.  Then I follow up and send her a friend request on Facebook.

It’s been about a week now and I have not heard from her.  I was just wondering, did I break that 3-day rule of contacting her?  I thought that rule was non-sense?  Anyway, I would love your insight on this topic and I would also appreciate any advice as to what I can/should do next without being all stalker-ish.

– Justin

Hi Justin,

This situation sounds embarrassingly familiar…echoes of my misspent youth, sigh.  There are a couple possibilities that might explain what happened.  Here’s the first.  You mentioned that you met lady at a bar, you hit it off with lady, you and lady kissed, then lady ignores you for the next week.  My guess?  Lady was drunk.  Maybe she seemed fine, maybe she only had a couple drinks, but I would bet my favorite pair of red heels that she was, in fact, wasty.  The next day she woke up with a dry mouth and a slamming head, recalled meeting a nice man with whom she flirted shamelessly, remembered making out in public, and thought, not again.  Just kidding.  Actually, she probably felt like an idiot for being so forward, or maybe her friends gave her grief about kissing a stranger, or perhaps she even has a boyfriend already and your interlude was an alcohol-induced indiscretion.  So when she saw your email and Facebook friend request, they were reminders of what she perceived to be her bad behavior, and she ignored both, pledging to reform her boozin’, free lovin’ ways.

How “relaxed” was she?

Let me explain why I think alcohol is a factor here.  Women–despite how crazy, flaky, and fickle some men believe they are–do not go from having a pleasant evening to deciding they never want to speak to you again by the next morning.  Doesn’t happen.  Some event must come to pass in between to make them change their mind about you.  Assuming you didn’t leave out the part in the story where you follow her home, knock on her bedroom window, and then expose yourself when she lifts the shade, the other explanation, besides inebriation, is that your perception of the evening was far different from hers.  Maybe you thought it was lively conversation but she was merely humoring you; maybe you thought the kissing was full of chemical sparks but she felt nothing.  But, at that point, she shouldn’t have given you her email address, and her joke about Facebook stalking seems out of place (if she really didn’t want you to contact her, why put the idea of Facebook in your head at all?).  So I still think it more likely that she was drunk.

I don’t think it was wrong at all to contact her the next day.  Contacting her by two methods–email and Facebook–was probably overkill, but then again, she welcomed both by giving you her email address and mentioning Facebook.  As I’ve mentioned here before, “rules” about dating, like you should wait 3 days before contacting a woman, are extraordinarily archaic.  And LAME . Think how much simpler life would be if people who were romantically involved said what they meant and acted upon what they said.  If you like someone, you ask them out.  If you still like them, you call them again.  And if you don’t, you tell them immediately, and gently.  I hate, hate, hate this idea that the way to love or sex or a committed relationship or a fun fling or whatever it is that you want, has to be cloaked in games and mystery.

Advice from any guy who calls you “baby” is worth a 2nd opinion.

All of this is to say, Justin, you did nothing wrong.  I think it’s great that you met a fabulous woman, had a fun time with her, kissed her, got her email address, and then contacted her the next day.  I think it’s a bummer that she didn’t get back to you, either because she was embarrassed (which apparently there was no need for) or because she was dishonest the night before when she gave you her email address.

As for your next steps with this woman?  There are none.  She’s telling you she’s not interested, for whatever reason.  Don’t let that discourage you; move on to other (perhaps more sober?) women.

-Beth

Got a question for Beth? Send them to: askawoman@dappered.com

Buying an inexpensive suit:  The Complete Dappered Guide

Above Suit:  Alfani RED Grey Sharkskin Slim Fit- $274.98 (but can be had for as little as $200)

A lot of these tips have been spread throughout this website, dropped in here and there with reckless abandon.  It’s time to get it all in one place.  For those who have visited Dappered with some frequency in the past, much of this will look familiar.  If you’re a newbie, know that all this “advice” comes from personal experience, by way of doing the opposite.  Here’s to hoping you’ve avoided some of the many mistakes I’ve made in the past…

Most men hate dressing up.  They’ve been told since they were knee high to a clearance rack that a suit is uncomfortable.  Most guys truly believe they look stupid in a suit.  Plus suits are so expensive, why should they invest that much cash in something they’ll hate wearing?

Sorry fellas.  Those are all lame excuses.  The truth is a man can buy a suit that he’ll look great in, and more importantly feel great about wearing, all for less than $300.  Sometimes for even cheaper than that.  It’s just a matter of knowing a few key tricks for picking out a suit, then what to do with it after the purchase.  Follow these few suggestions and a $250 suit will look better than some CEO’s $1500 luxury getup.  Here’s how to do it:

It’s all about fit.  Make sure you’re buying the right size.

The vast majority of suit wearing men are wearing suit jackets that are at least a size too big.  Guys, repeat after me: You are wearing the suit.  The suit is not wearing you.  Convinced you’re a 40 regular in the jacket?  Just try a 38.  You might be surprised.  What you don’t want is a jacket so big that the shoulder pads jut out over your actual shoulders.  Here’s an old trick:  Put the jacket on and stand next to a wall.  Slowly lean into the wall with your shoulder.  The pad and your shoulder should hit at the same time.  If the pad hits the wall first then scrunches up?  It’s too big.

If you’re anywhere close to being in shape, you need to be buying “trim fit” or “athletic cut” suits.  Those usually come pre contoured at the sides of the jacket, and will often have less shoulder padding.  Both of those features will give you a natural, masculine V-shape.  Normal suits will leave you looking like you’re stuck inside a barrel of cloth.  Don’t let the sales person try and talk you into a bigger suit.  They’re used to the types who believe comfort = loose.  It needs to fit, and after tailoring it’ll move with you.  More on that later.

Know your fabrics and brands

Stick with natural fabrics like wool.  Skip polyester which is almost always cheaper.  Wool moves better and is much more breathable than plasticized poly fabric.  Some brands like Kenneth Cole make their suits in both wool and synthetic.  Always check the tags, and stick with wool.

Also know that every brand is slightly different.  A 40 regular in a Tommy Hilfiger Trim Fit from Macy’s might actually be a 40 short in an Alfani Red.  Both available at the same department store, but different shapes once you put them on.  And stick with brands that seem to cater towards a younger (meaning under 40) audience.  So along with Alfani Red and Hilfiger, give Calibrate (Nordstrom), and DKNY a spin.

If you want to splurge a bit and get a suit custom made for you?  Take a look at Indochino.  They’re a custom suit company that makes suits for around $250 – $500.  Plus they pay up to $75 worth of extra alterations done by your tailor, and they’ve got an iron-clad guarantee.  Whatever your choice, skip the boxy Ralph Laurens and Jos. A Bank suits your Grandpa favors.

Go to the store prepared

When you head out to go suit shopping, make sure you’re wearing what you plan on wearing with a suit.  Meaning:  A pair of dress shoes, your favorite dress shirt, and a great looking tie.  The fitting room is a dress rehearsal for your potential suit.  You want to see what it’ll look like after the purchase.

Don’t be shy about bringing a friend or significant other with you.  You need an honest opinion to balance out the sales guy who will be in your ear from the start.  The sales person might honestly be trying to help, but more often than not they just get in the way.

After the Purchase:  Get it tailored.  It’s absolutely crucial.

Even if you bought a trim fit suit with extra contouring at the sides, you’ll need to get it tailored post-purchase.  Your suit is like your hair.  You need a professional who knows what they’re doing to give it the right shape.  Like wearing a jacket that’s too large, most men believe that suits fit perfect right off the rack.  Not true. You should at the very least consider having the jacket sides brought in a bit more and the sleeve length adjusted so you’re showing ¼ inch of shirt cuff.

Be warned:  a tailor can’t adjust the thickness of the shoulder pads, and shortening a jacket is a pretty messy job.  So get those two things right off the rack.  To see if the jacket is the right length, leave your arms loose at your sides and curl your fingers upward like you’re about to grab the handles on a wheel-barrow.  The jacket should end precisely in that valley in your fingers.  If it bunches up?  It’s too long.

Treat your inexpensive suit carefully

There’s a reason why a cheap suit is cheap.  It cost less to make from materials that aren’t super high quality.  After you get it tailored, store your suit in a breathable garment bag so dust and fabric munching bugs can’t get at it.  Also make sure the jacket is hanging on a wide shouldered hanger.  Gravity.  She’s a cruel force.  And if the hanger your suit jacket is on is a standard thin plastic or (good grief no) wire hanger, the shoulder pads will pinch, crease, and droop down over it.

Know that there’s no need to cut the pockets on the front of your suit jacket open.  If you like wearing a pocket square, then go ahead with the chest pocket.  But the lower pockets should stay closed.  That’ll help your jacket keep it’s shape.

Dry clean your suit as little as possible.  If you didn’t sweat in your suit, then don’t have it cleaned.  Unlike expensive suits which have a third piece in-between the exterior and interior layer of fabric (called a canvas) cheap suits are usually “fused” or glued together.  The harsh heat of the dry cleaning process will often melt the glue and cause ugly wrinkles to form as the glue settles back into uneven clumps.

Do cut the brand label off the sleeve if there is one.  It’s not like the label on the back of your Levi’s.  So the maker’s mark has to go.

What else?  Leave any other tips for cheap suit buying in the comments section below.

The Seven Not So Deadly Affordable Style Sins

1. Buying something just because it’s on sale

Do you need it?  Do you really even want it?  Do you already have a similar item in your closet, or hell… are you wearing an almost identical iteme at that very moment?  Then set it down and walk away.

2. Not taking care of your clothes properly.

You need garment bags for your suits, shoe trees for your shoes, and wide shouldered hangers for your blazers and sportcoats.  Those cardboard covered pants hangers are fine for your jeans and chinos, and plastic works well for regular shirts.  Never hang up your sweaters.  Those go in a drawer with a couple blocks of cedar.

3. Being overprotective of your clothes, shoes, etc…

Taking care of your stuff is one thing, freaking out if a speck of mud gets on your pants is another.  Remember how anal retentive Uncle Jesse was on Full House about his hair?  Right.  Don’t do that when it comes to your Italian loafers either.  Enjoy what you’ve worked hard to get.  Don’t walk around scared that someone will spill something on it.

4. Getting your hair cut by someone different each time.

Speaking of hair, your hair is the one thing you wear every single day.  You’re going to want to find someone that knows how you like it to look, and someone who you can be honest with if you weren’t exactly thrilled with how they cut it the last time.  Sure you want a talented stylist / barber.  But you also want the same one, each time.

5. Not having a tailor

Getting sick of hearing this yet?

6. Getting on a plane looking like you just rolled out of bed.

Those pilots?  The one that see you when you get on the plane?  Those are the same pilots who are keeping you from crashing into the ground.  How’d you like it if you stepped onto a 737 and the pilots were wearing flip flops?

7. Thinking about what you’re wearing after you leave the house.

Having a sense of style and looking good is a means to an end.  It’s not the end.  Feeling your best, having confidence, and being taken seriously by anyone you deal with is the point of all this.  So after it all goes on?  It should pretty much wander out of your mind.  Because now the real fun begins.

Additions, feedback, etc… all goes in the comments section below…

Five Style Difference Makers – The keys to standing out quietly.

Five simple keys.  Five game changers.  They are the five things that set the top 10% of all men apart, stylistically, from the rest of the crowd.  They make up the foundation for looking as good as possible, and more importantly feeling your absolute best in any situation.

Take em’ or leave em’.  Here they are,
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1. Wear well fitting tailored suit jackets and blazers

It’s almost unfair how much better a well fitting jacket will make a guy look.  Two major points of fit:  First, the shoulder pads need to be slight and should never jut out over your own shoulders.  And second, the waist needs to be tapered by your tailor to the point that a half inch more and you wouldn’t be able to comfortably hug someone.  Tail & sleeve length / how it drapes, etc, also important.  But the shoulders and waist are the big two.
(Below Left:  Dockers Traditional Bulky Sack Suit.  Right:  J. Crew Worsted Wool Ludlow Fit Suit – $590)

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2. Wear casual clothes that fit

That means the shoulder seam goes on your shoulder, your sweaters shouldn’t make you look 25 pounds heavier, and your untucked shirts shouldn’t hang halfway down to your knees.

3.  Know what shoes get worn when

Slim and shined laceups when you’re dressed up.  Thicker laceups, slim boots, or slim loafers when you’re kinda dressed up.  Clunkier stuff or classic sneakers when you’re kicking back.  Running shoes for running or the gym.  Sandals or flip flops for the beach or your backyard.  Burn your crocs.
(Below: PF Flyers center lo- $49.46 & Kenneth Cole Regal King – $148)

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4.  Invest in two great looking coats

For a huge part of the year you’ll be wearing a coat every day.  It gets a disproportionate amount of playing time in relation to the other pieces of clothing on your closet roster.  Go with a wool peacoat or a single breasted overcoat for the winter.  Ideally something that hits mid thigh so your blazer is more than just barely covered.  A slim (but not tight) trench or mac for the warmer months.

5.  Don’t look down on someone who doesn’t dress like you

Style and class go hand in hand.  Right along side of those are having your priorities straight.  You can be the best dressed man on the planet, but if you’re guffawing at others who are otherwise dressed respectfully and feel comfortable in their clothes?  Then you’re noting more than a prick in a well tailored suit.

Agreements, disagreements, and everything else goes in the comments section below…

Our 5 pieces of New Year’s Eve advice, plus yours in the comments section

I feel bad for the cops on a night like New Year’s.  Everyone else is out having fun, too many are pushing their own limits and luck, and it’s the cops who have to pick up the mess.  New Year’s can, and should be a blast.  It can also be expensive and frustrating.  Drop your best New Year’s Eve advice in the comments section so we can all learn from each other.  We’ll start with five tips from this end…
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1. Unless it’s bitter cold, leave the jacket in the car and wear a blazer instead.

If you’re ringing in the New Year indoors, a coat will just get in the way wherever you show up.  Your date probably will wear her coat.  Wear gloves, grab a scarf, and when you check her coat, stick them in her jacket’s pockets.

2. Use your card case and money clip

A lost wallet on New Year’s is as good as gone.  Card case with your ID and a credit card go in the front inside pocket of your suit jacket or blazer.  Cash (pay with cash, you risk leaving your card at the bar) goes in the clip.

3. The second line of Auld Lang Syne is:  “and never brought to mind?”

Which is precisely what happens to that second line, every single year when most of us try to remember it. Getting anything right after the first line: “Should old acquaintance be forgot” is gravy anyway…  Feel free to loudly mumble.

4.  Get out while the gettin’s good.  Staying out till bar time just isn’t worth it

Midnight?  Of course.  But the safe play is to start looking for the exit at least an hour before the lights get flipped on and the drunks stumble out into the street.  You’ll end up waiting forever for a cab, and you’ll probably enough drama on the streets to last the next few months.  Same goes for if you’re at a private party.

5. Don’t get plowed.

Getting drunk is something that happens, it’s not something you set out to do.  And this is a night when lots, LOTS of people are setting out to get trashed.  It’s a minefield, and you’ll need your wits at their sharpest at least once or twice tonight.  Drink a few glasses of water before you set out.  While you’re out, alternate with not just club soda but club soda with bitters. Orange bitters if they have em.  Hat tip to drinks correspondent Ben for the suggestion.

Your turn.  Your best New Year’s Eve advice goes below in the comments section.  All the best in 2011…